Thursday, February 25, 2010
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
The only person in my office even remotely close to my age used to be really nice to me. We had lunch together nearly every day from June to December. For the last 2 months she's been cold and practically unresponsive. I don't even know what the hell I did (if anything!) to make her start treating me like some useless summer temp. I'm sick of eating lunch everyday with my iPhone as my only company!
Monday, February 22, 2010
I hate his crybaby guts. He acts like he's got the weight of the world
on his shoulders and is too busy to be bothered by his wife or
children. Asking him to spend time with us or help out around the
house has become a tedious chore in and of itself. He has an excuse
for everything. He never acts like a man and takes responsibilty for
his actions. He sticks his tongue out at our small daughter when she
won't give him kisses whenever he asks. And then he whines at her. I
find that manipulative behavior toward a toddler disgusting. When I
say so to him he retreats physically and emotionally to punish me for
not finding his behavior perfect and charming. I'm very close to done
My dad treated my mom like a queen, and all of their kids were
treated respectfully and lovingly. How was I duped into thinking my
husband was like my dad, when really he's an ass?
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Monday, February 15, 2010
1: For the record, some of my best friends are old people.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Friday, February 12, 2010
Look, I don't care about your pets. I lie about the severity of my allergies just to keep me from having to go to your stinking, nasty house where animals live indoors. Don't kid yourself--it's not healthy for them or you. You may think you keep your house clean--you don't. You may not think it smells like cat litter or wet fur--it does. You just don't notice it anymore because you live in it. Also, your pets are not some magically altruistic friends and companions, who only think happy thoughts. They don't think much at all. They react. They are a-n-i-m-a-l-s. In the wild, they would eat you. If left without food long enough--they still would. They don't "care"; they don't "love" you. You are totally delusional. Even if I liked your pets, I still wouldn't need to hear stories about them. For godssake, unless it's The Secret of NIHM, keep your animal stories to yourself. And finally, if you treated people half as decently as you treat your pets, or spent half as much money to feed and house people, the world would be a better place for all of us.
Snakes and scales and puppy dog tails.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
I just started this blog business, so of course, I am checking out a bunch of other blogs. I am sooooo sick of only finding blogs by either stay-at-home, home-schooling, organic-cookie baking moms that blog mostly about how perfectly wonderful their little family is OR…..weird artsy-fartsy 20 somethings that ramble on about crap that does not make sense. Where are the blogs from divorced, single moms that work constantly (at office and home), are totally annoyed with their smart-ass teenagers and WISH they had time to scrap-book, bake cookies or do something other than watch movies from Blockbuster?????????????? FML!
Monday, February 8, 2010
You very kindly listed your office hours in our syllabus. You also posted them on your door... which was closed and locked when I arrived during what I thought was your appointed office time. Interestingly, both postings indicated that you would be in your office from 11 am to 1 pm today. Apparently 1:00 is the same as 12:00 on the planet you are from because I was informed that you had left the building already. A full hour before your office hours should have ended. Most excellent for you. Unfortunately, the rest of us run on real world time and live on the planet EARTH. FML!
Sunday, February 7, 2010
The National Tea Party Convention ended with a Palin for President rally.
This was always slated to be the weekend's main event, with a $100,000 prize purse. But the organizers still hadn't seen a copy of the speech as the crowd streamed into the banquet ballroom. What they got was less a Tea Party manifesto than Sarah Palin's State of the Union speech—an address to a domestic spending
Saturday, February 6, 2010
I know we were friends before I popped out a kid, and I'm sure you
miss spending time with just me. But seriously, your email inviting me
to see your new apartment? The one where you wrote "The kid can stay
at home?" Bite me. I'd rather see my kid than spend a weekend at your
apartment hearing about how you still wax your ex's balls. I'd rather
read my kid bed time stories than picture some dude's hairless nuts. I
love you. I really do. But enough with the testicles—and lack of tact.