Simple Rules of Telephone Etiquette:
1. If you spend more than 5% of the phone call talking/laughing/yelling at other people in the SAME ROOM as you, get off the phone and talk to THEM.
2. If you are doing household chores, don't call me to "keep you company".
3. If you are performing acts of personal hygiene, such as bathing/waxing your various parts etc. Fuck off. That shit is personal and NOBODY wants to listen to you do it.
4. If you have already called me at least once today, put the phone DOWN and wait until tomorrow or even next week.
5. If you don't have anything important to say, GOODBYE bitch.
One would *think* these would be common-sense for most people.