Sunday, January 30, 2011

One more

If ONE more person tells me to just relax and it will happen I will rip ONE of my useless ovaries out and throw it at them. That's not how it works if you have a legitimate medical condition, sorry to burst your bubble.
If just ONE sperm would meet up with ONE egg (which is never there) I would be willing to throw a parade.
Until then it's just ONE more needle stick, ONE more round of medication, ONE more negative test.
ONE more day, ONE more month, ONE more year, ONE more lifetime of trying and failing, of being defective, of being broken.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

that crumb of a husband

This whine is pretty measly compared to the guy asking for a divorce on the anniversary but who knows, sometimes it's the small stuff that leads up to such a huge step..

Two things bug me (at the moment) about my husband and his kitchen duties.

1. He never, ever wipes up the crumbs. Not from the dining table. Not from the cutting board island. Not from the stove top. I don't care how grease spattered, he's given himself a free pass for life on the crumb wiping.

2. When he does the dishes, I often join him. I clear the table, put leftovers away, bring him the pots and pans off the stove. And yes, I wipe the stove. Not always but often. When I do the dishes? He's squarely parked in front of the television. Relaxed and not giving a thought in the world to me, apparently. I know, I know. I should follow his lead, right? Let him suffer alone, too. Give myself the relaxing break. But I want him to join me. It makes the time go by faster. I like to lead by example, only it doesn't seem to be working.

Most of the time I cope with this minor quibble by reminding myself that plenty of husbands don't help at all. I can't decide if I'm enabling or if it's healthy, i.e., don't sweat the small stuff. Choose my nag battles, etc.

In the meantime, I'll just wine about it.

Monday, January 24, 2011

Happy Anniversary to Me!

Today is our fourteenth anniversary!  YAY!  I spent the day excited about where we might go for dinner to celebrate!  YAY!  When I got home, my husband told me he has been miserable for years, everything I say annoys him, and he's moving out!  yay.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

One less bell to answer

Now that you are finally moving out, putting an end to the slow death of our 20-year marriage, an old song by Dionne Warwick comes to mind...

Let me sing it for you:

One less bell to answer
One less egg to fry
One less man to pick up after
I should be happy
....

and I am!

That is all.

Saturday, January 15, 2011

Dear Starbucks Cashier

When you say "can I help you?" and then immediately start chatting to your co-worker, do you think you're going to catch my order?

Neither do I!

So why do you do it, over and over again?

And when I get a grande coffee and you charge me for a grande latte and I point it out to you, is it medically necessary to roll your eyes before crediting your mistake to my card?

Because in our society, the correct response is "oh, I'm sorry."

Love,
Caffeinated Marinka